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Healthy or unhealthy

Explore actions that make friendships positive or negative.

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You’ll need

  • Signs labelled "healthy", "unhealthy" and "not sure"
Guidance for volunteers (Healthy Relationships research)
PDF – 61.7KB
Download Guidance for volunteers (Healthy Relationships research)

Before you begin

  • Use the safety checklist to help you plan and risk assess your activity. There's also more guidance to help you carry out your risk assessment, including examples.
  • Make sure all young people and adults involved in the activity know how to take part safely.
  • Make sure you’ll have enough adult helpers. You may need some parents and carers to help.

Healthy Relationships research

This activity is part of our Healthy Relationships research. Please read the attached guidance for volunteers before running the activity.

Make sure you've got consent from the parents or carers of all young people taking part, using the Participant Information Sheet and Consent Form you’ve been given.

You’ll need to make a note of the group’s responses for each scenario - whether most or all of the group thought it was healthy or unhealthy, or whether responses were mixed.

When you've completed the activity, please share your feedback and your group’s responses using this form.

Submit your feedback and group's responses

Planning and setting up this activity

  • For this activity, you'll need to print or draw out the labels “healthy”, “unhealthy” and “not sure”. These should be placed clearly around the room.  
  • You'll also need a pen or paper, or something to make a note of the groups responses for each scenario.
  • Some parts of this activity may trigger emotions or personal experiences for young people. It’s important to be aware that discussions about friendships and relationships can sometimes bring up feelings of sadness, frustration, or discomfort.That’s why it’s important to create a supportive space where everyone feels comfortable and to keep an eye on how each young person is coping. If you have a concern about a young person, always follow the Safeguarding Code of Conduct (Yellow Card) and report it to the UK HQ Safeguarding Team.

Running this activity

  1. Gather everyone together and ask them what they think makes a relationship or friendship healthy or unhealthy. 
  2. Explain that healthy often means being kind, fair, and respectful, whereas unhealthy might make someone feel sad, left out, or uncomfortable. 
  3. Let them know that for today’s activity, they'll be told a statement and will need to move to the sign (or side of the room) that best fits their opinion. 
  4. Emphasise that it’s okay to have an opinion different from others, or to be unsure.  
  5. Read each scenario aloud to the group, giving them time to think and move to the sign they feel fits best.  
    • Sharing your snack with someone who forgot theirs 
    • Laughing at someone who makes a mistake 
    • Telling a friend a secret someone else told you 
    • Your friend gets jealous when you play with someone else 
    • Taking turns playing a game 
    • Someone teases you and then says ‘It’s just a joke’ 
    • A friend wants to spend time with you every day 
    • You ignore it when someone tells you to stop 
    • You don’t invite someone to your party because you don’t know them well 
    • You take something from a friend without asking 
    • You say ‘please’ and ‘thank you’ to a friend that you’ve known a long time 
    • You tell a friend that you don’t like how they’re treating you 
    • Someone who is new at Scouts looks left out, so you invite them to do the activity with you 
  6. Once everyone is in position, allow them to share why they chose the place they did. Not everyone will want to answer, and that’s okay - keep the environment safe and open for those who do. 
  7. After all the scenarios have been read, talk about any that had mixed responses and explore why people might have different views. Give young people time to think about their own friendships and relationships and whether they feel healthy.
  8. Try to reinforce key messages about respect, boundaries, and kindness. 

Reflection

This activity helped you explore what makes friendships and relationships positive or negative. By moving to the zones that matched your opinions and discussing your choices, you practised thinking about how different actions and behaviours can make people feel included, respected, or upset. 

Think about the activity and your choices. What did you find easy? What was challenging? Did anything surprise you about how others responded to the scenarios? Do you think this activity will help you understand how actions and behaviours affect others, and if so, how?

Talking about the scenarios helps you appreciate different opinions, and the hands-on part lets you express your ideas by moving, pointing, or sharing your thoughts with the group. By reflecting on healthy and unhealthy behaviours, you can think about how to act kindly, include others, and support your friends in everyday life.  

Safety

All activities must be safely managed. You must complete a thorough risk assessment and take appropriate steps to reduce risk. Use the safety checklist to help you plan and risk assess your activity. Always get approval for the activity, and have suitable supervision and an InTouch process.

You must run your activities in line with the Safeguarding Code of Conduct for Adults (Yellow Card) and report any concerns to the UK HQ Safeguarding Team.

  • To make this activity easier, you could focus only on scenarios that are clearly healthy or clearly unhealthy. This simplifies the task and helps young people recognise straightforward examples of positive and negative behaviours, without the need to consider less straightforward situations. You could also allow more time for discussion, give extra guidance, or use visual prompts to support understanding.
  • To make this activity harder, you could ask young people to come up with their own examples of healthy and unhealthy behaviours. This encourages them to think creatively and critically about friendships and relationships, apply what they have learned to real-life situations, and explain their reasoning to the group. You could also introduce scenarios that are more ambiguous (less straightforward), prompting discussion about how the same behaviour might be interpreted differently by different people. 
  • In this activity, people are asked to move physically from one zone to another. If movement is difficult, the signs could be placed on opposite ends of a table or mat, so people can indicate their choice by pointing or placing a marker.
  • You could use using large, high-contrast signs for visibility, ensuring text is clear and easy to read, or use buddy support so people can discuss their choices with a peer if needed. 
  • You can break the activity into smaller steps, read scenarios aloud more than once, or give extra time for thinking before people choose a zone.
  • Encourage people to respond in ways that feel comfortable, such as verbally, by pointing, or by moving a token, while maintaining a safe and supportive environment. Emphasise that it’s okay to have a different opinions or to be unsure, and check in regularly to make sure everyone understands the activity and feels included. 

All Scout activities should be inclusive and accessible.